Jun

Back to the future

Fri Jun 8th 2012 @ 3:35 am

So I’m sitting in my mentor Ken’s office, still in my “Waiting for the Lord” mode, when he once again said he thought I should consider getting back into talk radio. He had suggested this a few times previously and I had blown off the idea. As far as I was concerned, that would be going backwards: been there, done that. I had already had a successful career as a radio personality and had left for greener pastures. Besides, even though I was waiting for a call from God, I was convinced in my own mind that He was going to call me to become a preacher. After all, I already knew how to get up in front of people and talk…what else was there? Surely God was smart enough to recognize my skills and show me how to get started. I was waiting…but ready to preach. Just send me in Coach!

So going back to radio wasn’t an idea that I had even given serious consideration. But this time, Ken suggested something interesting. He had an opening for a part time talk host on his station on the weekends. Why not give it a shot…no permanent commitment to interfere with my call from God…just try it for a few weeks and have some fun…and make a few bucks. Besides which, I’d be helping Ken fill a slot. Hmmm. It’s not like my dance card was full; I had the time. And I could use the money, even though it wasn’t much. So I said yes.

I had a blast! I fell in love with doing radio all over again. In fact, I enjoyed it so much that I felt guilty…I’m supposed to be all serious while waiting for Jesus to put me in the ministry. But I had fun anyway. Then, after several weeks of this, Ken called me aside and told me that one of his prime talk show hosts was leaving and asked if I was interested in taking over his show. Now what? Part of me was ecstatic…the other part was fearful. I’m supposed to be a preacher, right? As I left Ken’s office to pray about it, he said something that ricocheted through my head: he said, “I’m not trying to talk you in or out of anything, but have you ever considered that on a huge radio station like this, you can witness for Christ to more people on the air in one day than you’d be able to in a year from the pulpit. Not by preaching to them but by showing His love in the way you handle the show.”

That thought wouldn't go away; it continued to roll around in my brain all evening. I finally said, “Lord, I don’t understand…you called me to be a preacher.”

He replied, “Says who?”

I said, “You did, Lord.”

“No....YOU told ME that's what I want. That’s not how I work.”

I spluttered, “But I thought…”

“Precisely… YOU thought;” God said. “ I do my own thinking; and I think it’s time for you to get back to what I actually want you to do…only this time, to do it for me instead of for money and pride.”

I asked, “Why didn’t you let me know sooner?”

God said, “I would have if I could have got you to shut up about that whole preacher thing. You’re supposed to ask me…not tell me.”

So it’s back its back to radio I go. Thomas Wolfe was wrong: you can go home. Michael J. Fox, however, had it right:

Back to the future!

Epilogue

I had been keeping a running tab of all my monthly expenses, down to the penny. That night, after I got things sorted out with God, I asked in prayer for that exact amount of money. To the penny. (You’ll note I asked: I didn’t tell Him.) The next morning, I went to see Ken and agreed to do the show. He asked, “Don’t you want to know how much money is involved?” I said that I wanted what he wanted to offer me. It was the first time in my life that I didn’t try to haggle over a contract. He made me an offer: it was the exact amount I had prayed for. To the penny. God is awesome…when we let Him be.

By the way, I learned a valuable lesson in this episode: when it comes to finances, always pray net not gross. I got it backwards. Ouch!

Thought for the Day

Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy.

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Semi-interesting fact

A Las Vegas hospital once had to suspend many of its’ workers for betting on when patients would die.

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Joke Du Jour

Moses told his followers after he came down from the mountain, "I've got good news and bad news. The good news is I got him down to 10. The bad news is that adultery's still in."

Questions I ask myself

Isn't it strange that the same people who laugh at fortune tellers take economists seriously?

Really?? Actual News

He's sooo ugly that... He’s capable of making a face even a mother would be pressed to love - and it’s won him $10,000. Tang Shuquan of Chengdu City, China, spent years working on contorting his face into the ugliest shapes possible. On Wednesday was rewarded for his years of hard work with a $10,000 prize and Guinness medal for the world’s most twisted face. So confident in his expertise, the 43-year-old is turning around and challenging the public to out-ugly him in a faceoff.

Anyone that can will get $15,000. Shuquan, who looks perfectly normal when he's not twisting his face up, can protrude his jaw so far up it covers the lips and bites his nose. The odd grimace is called 'gurning.’ It's not pretty. Shuquan started putting on pubilc performances of his ability 10 years ago, and is known as the King of Deformed Faces by the Chinese media, according to the AP. Shuquan competed in the World Guinness Records show in Italy in March, and was finally awarded the Guinness medal.

Meeting your inner fish Doctors in India have operated to remove a live fish from the lung

of a 12-year-old boy. Anil Barela swallowed the 3 1/2 inch fish while playing on a riverside with friends in the Khargone district of Madhya Pradesh state. It went down the wrong way and entered the boy's left lung. Anil soon started feeling short of breath and was x-rayed after the oxygen levels in his blood dropped alarmingly. Doctors decided on immediate surgery and removed the fish in a 45 minute operation. Dr Pramod Jhawar, chest specialist and bronchoscope expert, said it was the first case of its kind he had come across in 20 years. "The fish was live and taking its last breath when the bronchoscopy was done, restricting the functioning of both the lungs resulting in low intake of oxygen," he said.

A range of salts said to have been collected from human tears has gone on sale in London. Hoxton Street Supplies says the salts come from crying

humans experiencing a range of emotions. The $12 range includes salts harvested from tears of sorrow, tears shed while sneezing, tears shed while chopping onions, tears of laughter, and tears of anger. A spokesman for the company said that each salt had a distinctly different flavor. "Salt Made From Tears combines centuries-old craft with the freshest human tears which are gently boiled, released into shallow crystallization tanks, then harvested by hand and finally rinsed in brine," he said.

A lawyer for a Florida police officer fired for issuing too many traffic tickets said the officer will fight to be reinstated. The Palm Beach director of public safety said in a Tuesday termination letter Officer William Eaton violated department rules, including conduct unbecoming and using his position to intimidate the citizenry, when he wrote 115 traffic tickets in a single month earlier this year, the Palm Beach Post reported Thursday. Union leaders said two other officers are facing similar terminations. Elizabeth Parker, Eaton's attorney, said her client will fight to be reinstated. She said he started writing more tickets to more effectively perform his duties when the town changed rules in January to give bonuses based on merit instead of longevity.

Random Musing

If all of our misfortunes were laid in one common heap from which everyone must take an equal portion, most people would be contented to take their own. Socrates

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Are you kidding me???

There are 8,674 different Hebrew words in the Bible (KJV), 5,624 different Greek words, and 12,143 different English words.

Groaner

Why couldn't they play cards on the ark? Because Noah was sitting on the deck

Point to Ponder

Imagine you owned a four-karat diamond worth thousands of dollars. The beautiful diamond is delicately displayed in a setting made up of five or six fingers called prongs. If the prongs are soft and prone to bending, then one sharp bump and the diamond is lost forever. A qualified jeweller would never mount such a stone in a weak setting. The jeweller works diligently on the setting for each stone. When the diamond is polished and set, the fingers of the setting are made to rightly grasp the stone. The setting not only displays the radiant beauty of the diamond but also holds it fast. Then when the ring is bumped, the strong fingers won't let go. Character is like the setting of a ring. If we do not allow God to build in us strong character, then we won't be ready for the success He wants to bring to our lives.4

Remember, Christianity is more about walking than about talking

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